


00qad headcanons

by Ragingstillness



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), London Spy
Genre: M/M, all sorts of aus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-20
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2019-11-26 00:19:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 32
Words: 10,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18173357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ragingstillness/pseuds/Ragingstillness
Summary: A collection of my long hcs posted originally on discord. Feel welcome to write any of these as I am inundated with WIPs and would be thrilled to see them written.





	1. Olympics au

-Professional Long-Distance Swimmer Alex

-MMA coach, retired Olympian James

-Hurdler equipment supervisor Danny

-Technological Coordinator Q

 

Danny got a crush on Alex first, because he was running equipment across the arena to set up for the next day and he spotted Alex coming out of the water after a quick practice, and of course the whole scene went slow-mo and trailed gently up Alex's wet dripping hair, shaking it gently out of his face, eyelashes glittering, long drips of water sluicing down his rock hard abs, thick arm muscles flexing to push him out of the water, tight butt poking out as he stands up.

 

Danny almost dropped a hurdle on his foot.

 

Alex actually saw him and rushed forward to catch it before the entire stack Danny was carrying fell.

 

He asked, (of course) "are you ok?" and Danny flushed and muttered something like "fine, heavy, wet, very wet, fine, I, hurry, bye!"

 

Q works with all three of them and comes to meet with them for various reasons, as a bunch of the guys who would usually do that took off for hangovers or some other bs excuse so Q's had to cover their jobs angrily.

 

He always shows up irritated. Danny is a bit intimidated, Alex is very cowed, and James thinks he's absolutely adorable.

 

Alex runs into James in a locker room once and nearly loses his mind because he's seen James' MMA before and kind of sort of maybe might have his sexual awakening from some of James' matches.

 

James is smart enough to spot this in Alex but knows he can't distract him from his Olympic run, so he keeps a bit of professional distance as much as he wants to shove Alex up against the wall and ruin him.

 

Alex keeps running into Danny and they form a bit of a friendship/flirty connection.

 

Danny encourages Alex when he's down because Alex has, against his parents' wishes, come out as one of the few openly gay Olympians.

 

The day before Alex's swim he and Danny have a moment, that doesn't go anywhere but is really close to going somewhere.

Danny despairs that he can't see Alex swim because he's doing equipment for the hurdles, but he focuses his mind on the task, holding onto a hope that he might maybe just maybe manage to make it after the races to the very end of Alex's race.

 

The hurdles go well, and Danny works super hard then sprints off towards the pool, surprising everyone around him with his speed, even the professional sprinters.

 

It falls to Danny's supervisor Scotty to explain to the athletes and other equipment managers that Danny actually was in training to be an Olympic hurdler himself, but his first coach tried to come on to him and while nothing happened he was too disturbed to ever run again.

 

Nevertheless, for Alex, Danny runs, and he runs fast.

 

He makes it just as Alex is stroking hard to the end of his final race, finishing in first for the 400 IM in his first Olympics.

 

Alex comes out of the water and sees Danny up in the stands. He waves him down, even though it's against regulations, and Danny runs onto deck as the crowd holds their breaths, and then finally Danny barrels towards Alex, slips on the wet tile, and skids into Alex's arms. Alex sweeps him up and kisses him on international television.

 

Meanwhile, one of the fighters in James' matches cheats and hurts one of James' fighters. He almost rushes the other fighter, but Q comes out of nowhere to hold him back, all the while calibrating the scoreboard in his earpiece. James realizes that it's Q's quick, intelligent, voice that knocked him out of his blood rage which is something that's happened with almost no one else. Most people think James left the sport because he got too old but really James just looked at his own mind and realized he wasn't too old, but too violent. But Q does the impossible.

 

James calms down, the fights go on, then he tracks down Q in the tech office later and shoves him against the wall. Q's a bit scared but he tries not to show it. Then James leans in close and promises a multitude of rough and dirty things he's gonna do to Q if he meets him at the hotel later that night.

 

All Q can do is nod and try to breathe again.

 

James is on his way to the hotel when he runs into Alex and Danny. One look at Alex's flushed, happy face and strong build has him remembering why he had wanted his little fan in the first place. But he's clearly with Danny and James has Q to meet.

 

Being the only real adult out of all of them, he calls up Q and explain the situation. Q, not really expecting anything other than a night of fun, flippantly suggests that James bring Alex along. James verifies that he's sure then he comes over and present the arrangement to Alex and Danny. Danny is initially very defensive, not just because James is a coach but also because he's only just gotten together with Alex.

Then James begins describing Q and Danny realizes that he's had a one-night stand with Q ages ago, during a speed dating event in London where they bonded over their similar appearance then went off to see how similar they were without their clothes. It was an unforgettable night but when Danny tried to contact Q again he was informed that Q's parents had died, and Q been shipped off to some far-off relatives.

 

Danny is eager to reconnect with Q and after hearing Alex's account of James and his integrity Danny agrees to at least try it.

 

They all show up, Q is overjoyed to see Danny and Alex is so thrilled to learn that his hero wants him.

 

Happy talking and eager physical contact eventually turns into sex, the kind that is surprisingly gentle instead of the rough, sweaty kind that they all had been expecting. There's just something about the others that makes them want to treat each other gently.

 

That night ends up kindling love rather than lust and they all decide to celebrate Alex's win and James' retirement with a trip backpacking through Europe before returning to London where they all, surprisingly, live.

 

Of course, the relationship builds from there and when they make it back, they all move in with James, who has the largest place.

 


	2. Prostitute!Danny au

Q wants to do something nice for James for his bday so he goes searching and finds Danny on an escort agency's website. He invites him over to do a background check but ends up falling into bed with him and being quite satisfied in the process. He is ever more motivated to get Danny to come over for James' bday so James can be double teamed by what looks like two of his boyfriend.

Danny does come over and is absolutely spectacular and James just about loses his mind.

Later, while James is working with Alex (who is 009 in this) and finds out, to his great surprise, that Alex has somehow remained a virgin. He speaks to him about it and talks up Danny's skills until Alex, drunk one night, makes the call. Danny of course comes over, is very taken with Alex, and makes his first time very special.

They all come together slowly over the course of their connections to each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope y'all are enjoying these hcs. Please feel free to write any of these.


	3. Lots of Q lovin' au

Lots of OCs as 00s, like James as 007, Alex as 009, maybe Danny as 003, and a couple of other ocs, all realizing together in various moments how special their quartermaster is and how hard he works for them. They meet in some of the field agent break rooms to chat about how they could thank Q. James, the perv, suggests they all go run train on him. It takes some convincing but they do agree on that idea and make the offer to Q, who is so shocked he accepts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again these are free for anyone to write if they want to.


	4. Porn Star! Q and Danny au

Porn stars Q and Danny.

They do all that fantasy of sleeping with twins stuff but they're really strict about not doing incest play.

Alex and James are college age friends who both love Q and Danny. A convention comes to town allowing people to meet the porn stars and James and Alex go, hoping to meet Q and Danny and perhaps even get to take them home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of these are short and some of these are long. It really won't be very consistent.


	5. Role Reversal Honeypot au

Q and Danny as 008 and 004 respectively, famed for doing Honeypot missions together. Alex and James are their supervisors, having to handle listening to them seduce and sleep with people every mission.


	6. Crack Honeypot au

James gets laid up in bed with an injury and all the other agents are out. It's a London based honeypot mission and the target likes thin young blonde men. James was going to do it because he's blonde but he's got that injury.

M, smirking through his teeth, instructs Q to do it. He's not blonde but he matches all the other qualifications.

Q protests, claiming he has no idea how to seduce people. Then he comes out of nowhere as a natural, still totally innocent of his charms and abilities, as James and the others monitor him in shocked and (in James' case) aroused silence


	7. James in London Spy au

James gets assigned to seduce Alex for a mission right around the time he's with Danny. He makes his move while Danny's in the bathroom during a date, coincidentally turning up just at a time to not notice Alex had been eating with anyone else.

He's working on Alex, who's shyly not quite into it, when Danny comes back and just gets all up in James' face, being protective and a bit possessive of Alex, who is charmed by this.

James' in a moment of shock due to Danny's looks, comes in with a "well I wouldn't be opposed to taking both of you home."

Q, on comms, spits out his tea, coughs, then facepalms. James ends up getting his wish and Q has to watch and listen through the video feeds


	8. Alex's secret au

Alex is not quite as innocent as he seems. He's still a virgin, and knows nothing about making love, but, he has quite a great deal of experience running a fake phone sex line for a mission he went on years ago. He is a bit ashamed of this talent but he finally decides to try and use that voice on Danny who just about loses his mind and just dives for Alex.


	9. Blushy Alex au

Alex blushes like a peach. Literally. It's hard to make him crack but when he does it gets high in his cheeks, up on the tips of his ears, and then all down his neck and chest. James thinks this is adorable and tries his hardest to make it happen in the most inopportune situations.


	10. Everyone works for MI6 au

Danny and Q are both techies and one day the HQ gets audited by the government and they are frantically trying to hide various secret projects on the short notice in a closet when suddenly they hear footsteps. Danny immediately stuffs the small inventions down his shirt and pulls Q into a deep kiss.

The door opens and for a moment there's silence. Then they hear James' voice. "It's ok, I'll wait." They look up to see him and Alex in the doorway, smirking.


	11. Pole Dance Danny au

Danny has a secret talent. He was messing around once at a low-key rave or sorts (basically ppl sitting around occasionally dancing and getting high) in an old warehouse and one of the guys there said he knew how to pole dance. He demonstrated a little and while Danny was impressed with the stripping the guy did as he went, the sheer physical strength really took his breath away. Sweat dripping down between shoulder blades, the muscles in forearms and thighs flexing as he climbed the pole. Danny got the man's name and contact info before he blacked out and contacted the guy later, saying he wanted to learn. Somehow, years later, Danny's boyfriends find out, and yet he's very reluctant to show them because he thinks they'll only appreciate it for the sexual element. He is wrong.


	12. Lap Dance Q au (that I'm honestly not really satisfied with)

James gets captured in a suburban house and his hands are tied behind his back. His captors aren't very smart but they do tie good knots. He tricks them into allowing him a phone call and he calls a secure line for MI6 and communicates roughly where he is. Suddenly someone shows up at the door and when the captors ask who it is, the voice on the other side tells them that he's a stripper James called. The captors all laugh at James for using his last request for that but they let the person in.

 

James suspected MI6 would send someone but he never expected who arrives or the cover they're using. Q walks in, as happy as can be, and gives James a sultry lap dance, using it as an excuse to pass him several weapons. James can't move his hands so all he can do is get incredibly aroused and growl at Q that he's gonna finish the job when James gets home.


	13. Mirror Sex au

Danny notices Alex's discomfort with his own body and sexuality so he slowly tricks Alex into having sex in front of various semi-reflective surfaces until finally he's conditioned Alex to associate seeing parts of his body with pleasure and they have celebratory sex in front of a full length mirror.


	14. ABO D/S au

-Omega sub Alex

-Alpha switch Danny

-Alpha switch James

-Omega switch Q

 

 

Like periods, Omegas sync up on their heats and this makes Danny and James very happy because Alex is already very sensitive due to his inexperience with sex and sexuality and Q is much more experienced but also physically weaker and smaller than Danny. This leads to an adorable dichotomy when they try to soothe each other through heats where Q’s trying to take control but once Alex lays down on him he can’t shift his weight. However, Alex feels uncomfortable on top so eventually he’ll drop onto his back but then Q’s weight and strength isn’t enough to make him feel like he’s being held down.

 

 

Basically they writhe over each other, twisting and turning in their nest, mewling for their Alphas the less satisfying the sex gets.

 

 

James will break eventually, pitting the sweet unsatisfied Omegas, but Danny is brutal. He’s got almost more sex experience than James and definitely a more varied one so he knows that the best, most satisfying orgasms during heat occur when the Omega needs it so much they think they’ll lose their minds without it.

 

 

Danny won’t step in until Alex is practically screaming, flopping off of the nest, crawling to his feet, and begging Danny to tend to him. Only then will Danny smirk, flash his eyes red, usher Alex back to the bed, and screw him six ways to Sunday.

 

 

There’s something to be said for desperation because when James steps in early Q still has to go several times before the wave passes.

 

 

Danny’s way Lays. Alex. Out.

 

 

Like Alex comes so hard his vision whites out and his whole body shakes, arches his back, lands back on the bed, and is unconscious until the next wave before his head hits the pillow.

 

 

The one time James tried to do Danny’s method on Q, all the electronic devices in the house were hacked and used purely for the purpose of getting James into bed right the hell now. Q Domed James so hard he couldn’t walk straight for a few days and couldn’t get hard for a week. It was too much for his old bones even though Q was prancing around like a sprite all weekend.


	15. Genderbend 00qad au

Jamie Bond x Female!Q x Alexis x Dani

 

 

Jamie is the Most Butch.

 

 

Q (who is Quinn in this au) gets real flustered seeing Jamie striding into Q-branch in her trademark suit and tie.

 

 

Quinn still wears cardigans and ties but she also wears cute plaid skirts and combat boots (for engineering safety).

 

 

Dani is a rocker girl. She’s always wearing push-up bras and ripped crop-tops over tight jeans. She’s got a lot of tattoos and even more piercings

 

 

Alexis has always been the agent to play the innocent card (Regardless of its truth) so she wears long halter top dresses and pea coats. She also has small black glasses but she doesn’t wear them very often. She also wears headbands color coordinated to her outfits.

 

 

Quinn has created entire lines of weaponry for Jamie that look from the outside like makeup. It’s her specialty. Jamie is constantly asking Quinn for an exploding lipstick. Quinn is convinces Jamie will make the mistake of using it on her own lips and blow her face off.

 

 

Alexis is on a mission to pickpocket a mark as he comes out of a club. She runs into Dani instead, who immediately starts flirting with her but Alexis can see that Dani’s interest is genuine and more than skin deep. They tentatively start a relationship from there. When they have their first time, Dani makes Alexis come six times before she lets her rest.

 

 

Alexis has been friends with Jamie for a while, and was friends with benefits with her in the past. Rather tame benefits, just making out and furtive fingering.

 

 

Alexis brings Dani with her on one of her missions although Dani doesn’t know it and uses her as part of her cover. There is an administrative mix up and Jamie and Quinn show up together to do the same job. Alexis introduces them to Dani as friends from work and they all hit it off.

 

 

This trend continues until a mission goes wrong and Dani is captured. They rescue her but not before she learns everything. She’s furious but after speaking with Jamie and especially Quinn, she lets Alexis have a chance to make it up to her.


	16. Royalty au

Q is king, James his loyal knight, Alex his advisor, and Danny his peasant body double.

 

 

Little does the rest of the kingdom know that Danny is kept by King Q on retainer for more than just being his body double.

 

 

James has to stand guard outside of their rooms while they have sex and keep them safe. He discovers he’s very uncomfortably aroused by the noise and the rare glimpses he actual gets of them.

 

 

Danny stays in the palace with Q and as he wasn’t educated as royalty, Alex becomes his tutor. Danny’s never claimed to be exclusive with Q and he flirts shamelessly with Alex. Alex is flustered by Danny’s salacious and crude stories but he’s also involuntarily interested. He begins a relationship with Danny, who then ropes him into his games with Q

 

 

This goes on for several months until one night Q leaves the door open and James steps a little into the room, eyes averted, to let them know the door is open.

 

 

“For goodness sakes,” King Q says. “Just come in James. Shut the door, I want to make you scream.” James was trained to obey orders.


	17. Criminal au

Danny is a pickpocket during the day and one of the most successful drug dealers in the city by night.

 

James is hired muscle. He breaks bones for any agency that will pay him enough.

 

Q’s a black hat hacker. He likes to fudge around with the balance of money in banks and political communication purely for the chaos of it when in between commissions.

 

Alex is a lure. He seduced targets for kidnapping or ambushes. If you want someone to be somewhere at a certain time, Alex will get them there. His success rate ensures his protection.

 

The 4 all attend orgies that guy Rich sets up, although Alex is only an observer.


	18. Corporate Sharks au

Danny is a major executive who doesn’t actually know what he’s doing but got hooked into the business when his mentor, Scottie, disappeared with his lover, leaving Danny his lucrative business. Danny wanted initially to refuse but pure spite against the pompous board members and the joy of being more powerful than others kept him in the job.

 

 

Alex is his bodyguard and occasional bed-warmer.

 

 

James is the public face of Q’s company. Q doesn’t want anyone to know he’s the real owner so he hired James for his intimidation factor and how competitive he was with other companies. Q instead is known as James’ arm candy. Nevertheless, anyone who calls him that has been known to be digitally ruined soon after.

 

 

James and Danny are in direct competition. They both leave their first meetings seething. James due to Danny’s impertinence, Danny to James’ contempt.

 

 

Danny’s ranting around when Alex suggests he may just be crushing on or admiring the man. Danny pounds Alex into the mattress that night to ignore the fact that he is right.

 

 

James sends Q to seduce Alex so he can learn about Danny. Or rather, Q volunteers for the job and orders James to order him.

 

 

Alex is taken in by Q as he feels like a chance to get with the body of the man he loves and not have the wall of professionalism and Danny’s prickly nature between them. Danny and James find out and they’re furious.

 

 

Many long talks are had in which Danny finally allows himself to be emotionally vulnerable and tell Alex he loves him too and James gets to show Q the depth of his feelings.

 

 

They date as independent couples until they begin to miss little pieces of the other couple and come together like a tsunami meeting an earthquake.


	19. Inexperienced!Alex x Experienced!James

Q and Danny are out or working or something and Alex is feeling like he wants to have sex but the usual people he sleeps with are out. He finally works up the courage to approach James who acts normal but is cackling maniacally in his head. He promises Alex what he wants and a little something new.

 

Cut to two hours later.

 

Alex is barely conscious on the bed, his head hanging over the side, he's shaking with little extra tremors, soaked in sweat, covered in small drops of red wax and trails of water. He's also covered in long red lines that under closer examination can be identified as lipstick. It's smeared on his lips and all down his throat as well. James is sitting on the other side of the bed, watching with glee as Alex's fingers spasmodically grip the sheets. James is smoking one of Danny's cigarettes, a washcloth lies in his lap. That's how Q and Danny find them.

Danny is a dramatic little shit so he drops his groceries, (Q barely catches them) and claps his hands around his mouth gasping, "You killed our boyfriend!"

 

James, poking Alex on his reddened bum- "Are you dead sweetie?"

 

Alex- "mhgmhf"

 

Q, scoffing and moving off to the kitchen to be responsible- "He's ok"

 

Danny jumps onto the bed, purposely jostling Alex, eliciting a soft moan. He leans back and clenches his abs so he's leaning a bit of his weight on Alex's back. He sets his other hand down with a slap on Alex's butt like the arm of a chair. Alex makes a soft keening noise, his hands clenching into the sheets and his face falling away.

 

James grins at Danny.

 

"So," Danny says. "What did you do to him?"

 

A blush begins to creep down Alex's ears and back. James begins to launch into a deep, explicit explanation, interrupted by Danny's appreciative moans.

 

Q comes back in and leans against the side of the bed, close to Alex's face. Alex snuggles into Q's hip the more embarrassed he gets. Q strokes his hair but is actually not all that supportive, as he gently guides Alex's cheek to where he's slowly hardening with each of James’ words. Danny is shamelessly already palming himself.

 

 


	20. G-rated Mr. Men parody

Medical at MI6 does like a series of videos for new agents in that like Mr. Men style and it’s like, “Don’t be like James. James tried to sew up a wound with dental floss. James is very stupid.”

 

Q made a whole set of mr men books called mister or madam 00

 

Mr. 00 was trying to look tough, so he drank what Mr. Bad Guy put in front of him. Then Mr. Q, the smart one, had to help him restart his heart. Don’t be like Mr. 00.

 

James retaliates by making lab safety videos about the Q branch:

 

Mr. Q thought he could put gunpowder in a lighter case and control when it exploded. Mr. Q had not slept in six days and was a mess. Mr. Q lost his eyebrows that day. Don’t be like Mr. Q.

 

Ms. R thought she could trick Mr. 007. Ms. R was wrong.

 

Mrs. M decided all her agents were idiots. It was the third time that day. Mrs. M was still right.

There's a 3-part series about mister 007 lighting embassies on fire.

 

Mr. 007 was asleep during his international politics classes. Mr. Tanner had to slap him on the head to wake him up. Mr. 007 is still cross about that. Mr. 007 has not learned his lesson.


	21. Autistic!Alex au

Alex is somewhere loosely between hyperverbal (speaking a lot) and nonverbal (doesn’t speak at all) but he’s closer to the nonverbal side. He’s been shamed for speaking randomly and out of turn so he has become uncomfortable with doing anything but choosing his words carefully which he was already prone to doing.

 

Alex has difficulty examining his own emotions unless they are very strong. He feels blank most of the time which is why he’s so shocked to find a rush of emotion come from being around Danny.

 

Alex tends to express his emotions non verbally. When he’s feeling something very strongly he expresses it by focusing on how it feels in his head. This makes him seem like he lacks emotion but in reality it’s just all dancing around inside his head.

 

A lot of Alex’s social skills are mimicry and performance. He says things the way he suspects someone normal would say things in the situations someone normal would say them.

 

Alex is very touch sensitive. This is why he’s gasping and shaking so much during his first time with Danny. He’s getting overwhelmed with sensation but it’s sensation he likes and his brain is just swimming in endorphins.

 

He’s also pressure sensitive, but in a bad way. Too much pressure and it’ll freak him out

 

He’s also auditory sensitive but it manifests as music he loves.

 

Alex stims by clenching and unclenching his fists.

 

Alex will go nonverbal when he’s stressed and his meltdowns look like him going very quiet and rocking slowly in a quiet place where he can put his back against a wall and see the room before him.

 

Alex likes solid touch, not gentle, not harsh, just affirmative. This means that while he doesn't like to be strapped down, being held down with just enough to keep him in a given position is very comforting to him. It's a line that's hard to walk so he tries it first with James, who is very good at modulating his strength, while Danny and Q watch and learn

eventually they reach a point where Danny can ride Alex until he cries while Q and James hold his arms and shoulders down.


	22. Sentinel/Guide au

Sentinels have enhanced senses and strength but they tend to get overwhelmed and kind of dissociate sometimes. Guides have heightened empathy and the ability to be a sense base line for sentinels. They also have soulmate like connections.

 

Alex is a sentinel, James is a sentinel, and Q is a sentinel. Danny is a ridiculously powerful guide.

 

Danny's had tons of sex in the past simply because horny sentinels wanted to feel solid while they got their rocks off. It's left him feeling very used, but with Alex, James, and Q it's the exact opposite. Danny practically has his own harem.

 

James, Alex, and Q just orbit around Danny, returning to him whenever they need to feel settled and real. At any given time Danny has one of them tucked under his arm, or holding him in their lap, or curled around him under a blanket. They treat him like a prince.

 

Danny went for years without finding any of his sentinels. leading him to swoons (which is the guide version of dissociating where emotions overwhelm them and they feel everything).

 

Then he bumped into Alex on the bridge and they clicked immediately.

 

Alex was raised to believe he had to be alone. Frances even went far enough to say he had a birth defect that wouldn't allow him to ever have a mate and that's why Alex ran.

 

Unfortunately, running from a bond like this induces exhaustion and lack of concentration in sentinels and emotional distress in guides. Danny works desperately to find Alex for this reason.

 

Alex makes a trip to MI6 to deliver a message from MI5 and it's there he runs into James. They click immediately and James knows that two sentinels can only bond if there's a guide somewhere in the group. He runs up and clutches Alex's hands and demands to know where he is.

 

Alex is confused but then James clarifies. "Our guide, where is he? Now that you've mated with me we have to find him before the bond snaps, and we lose our minds to dissociation forever!"

 

Alex hasn't been educated in this at all and panics, having no way to find Danny. James calms him down then claims that if anyone can find Danny it'll be someone from Q branch. They arrive and run into the new Q branch intern, Q himself.

 

They feel another link in the chain lock in and Q is very easy to convince to help find Danny. He gets Danny's home address in half an hour and they all rush over.

 

Danny comes home to find them all pacing around his room where his housemate left them after sensing the new bond.

 

He's shocked but the sheer relief that comes with seeing Alex again, he forgets his fear of strangers. Danny runs into Alex's arms and it's almost perfect, then Q and James join the hug on his other sides and it all clicks into place.

 

The sex is fantastic. Danny in the middle, settling each of his lovers with touches.


	23. Self-Defense au

Alex decides to teach Danny how to defend himself, and while Danny is not super strong he’s quick on his feet. The first time Alex ends up on his back with his head between Danny’s legs he has to end the lesson there and excuse himself for a guilty wank.

 

James decides to join in and teach Danny to shoot a gun. Danny is a lot more interested in grinding his arse back against an increasingly distracted James than shooting properly.


	24. ABO catboy au

When Omegas are satisfied they purr and they’re basically catboys.

 

Alex’s ears flick a lot and they’re the same burnished gold of his hair. Q’s flop down a little and they’re black as night. Both them have tails but Alex likes to keep his curled up over his back defensively while Q’s is always out, helping him balance as he moves all over the place.

 

James likes to yank lightly on Q’s tail when he’s doing him from behind to pull him back. It makes Q mewl.

 

One of Danny’s favorite things to do is rub his thumbs over the back of Alex’s ears. He was raised not to make any noise but something about that touch makes him shiver, purr deeply and get hard in seconds.

 

When Danny’s Doming Alex he’ll get him so riled up that Alex will whimper and roll over onto his back, all limbs tucked up and away, revealing his belly and throat to his Dom. It’s very pleasing for Danny.


	25. Teasing James au

James is pretty embarrassed to realize it, but he eventually has to acknowledge that he has a kink for watching Q and Danny together.

 

It’s like watching someone make love to themselves.

 

He does his best to not let them know but Danny’s too observant to not notice. Danny tells Q and they concoct a plan to get caught by James in various salacious positions until he cracks.

 

Alex is just confused because they’re hamming it up for James as much as possible. Like breathing hard into each other’s faces, eyes lidded, drawing away from kisses with their mouths open and a line of spit connecting them.

 

Q pretends to be innocent and James keeps catching them in all sorts of tempting positions.

 

Like James walks into a room once to see Q pinned to the wall, his eyes wide and a little afraid, biting down on his lip, fluttering his eyelashes with one of his hands pushing ineffectually against Danny as he slips a hand around the back of Q’s shirt down into his pants, the other rubbing his cock through his jeans and his teeth set in a devilish grin buried in Q’s neck.

 

Q doesn’t notice him at first and James can see him flushing and hear him whisper “D-Danny not here. James might see.”

 

Danny: “What James doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

 

Q: _gasp_ b-but you-you’re touching me and if he comes in here w-won’t be time to hide.”

 

Danny: _rubs particularly hard_ “why do you want to hide? Is it because you’re embarrassed about how hot you get for me? How desperate? Do you think when James went to bed he dreamed about how you begged for me on that very bed not two hours before? Did he hear your sweet little voice through the thin walls? What do you think he’d think if he saw you like this now? He’d see you for what you really are. Just a mess of red skin, trembling knees _slides a knee between Q’s legs_ and such a soft little arse.”

 

Danny likes to sneak into the bathroom when Q is taking a shower, just to torment him. Not to let him come, just to get him hard enough that he has to make a decision on what to use to hide himself when he leaves for work.

 

Danny makes sure he always has to run out just when James is coming in and doesn't give Q enough time to calm down then teases him about it later. "AWWW did you see the look on James' face? He wanted to eat you up. Naughty boy, letting yourself get hard around someone who can't sleep with you when he's working. So lewd. Aren't you embarrassed? Little pervert?"

Q is being Domed but he is also still in on trying to get James to jump them really hard so eventually after seeing how turned on it's making Alex, they bring him in too to help seduce James. They basically use him as a "replacement" for James (meaning they put him before the two of them to make James wish he was Alex) and Alex just hams it up about how much he loves being with both of them, how he likes them looking so similar, put him in positions where Q and Danny are mirroring each other.

 

 


	26. Danny's pants au that got out of hand

Danny wears his pants really low on his hips. James takes advantage of it to slip his hands down Danny’s underwear and surreptitiously get him off while he stands at the counter trying to wash dishes.

 

Alex is trying to sleep on the couch after a long night so James sticks a hand down Q’s and Danny’s pants and whispers that they’d better come quietly or the officer will wake up and take them to jail.

 

James is the king of “let’s do something sexy that will make u make noise in circumstances where u have to be quiet.”

He especially likes doing it to Alex during stakeouts on missions with the comms on to the entire Q branch. Because of this Alex has magically gained the ability to come in complete silence.

 

They once had a messy picnic on their kitchen table and James sat down next to Alex, reached under the table cloth, and aside from a spreading blush no one knew that he’d come until he stood up and rushed from the room.

 

Some prat from MI5 tries to recruit Alex again and asks for his qualifications. However, he has to ask Alex’s direct superior which James is. So, James and Alex are sitting at a table and smiling serenely at this man and he says, “what are the agent’s qualifications?”

 

And James says, “well he’s proficient in close range firearms, a hacker worthy of Q branch, able to remain deep undercover, oh, and he can orgasm in absolutely silence.” Then they both grin at the man until he gets uncomfortable and leaves.

 


	27. Danny, Q, and Alex have a secret au

 

Alex, Danny, and Q are much less sexually experienced as James, so they haven’t been trained out of reacting to specific erogenous zones on their bodies that occur naturally. The three of them do anything they can to keep James from finding out. Because they know that if he does he’ll exploit it to bits.

 

For Q’s it’s licking the tips of his ears, for Alex it’s squeezing his ass, and for Danny it’s running nails up the back of his neck and over his hipbones.

 

James is a spy so he knows something is up and he declares to his boyfriends that whatever it is he will find out, it’s only a matter of time.

 

While James is not aware of the spots, the three of them most certainly are, which leads James to try and spy on them when they have sex in pairs, or a group of three, or solo, to figure out which gestures they’re using as secret weapons.

 

Cue lots of voyeurism and the three being overwhelmed by being the objects of all of James’ attention.

 

Eventually he just requests, innocently, to watch them get themselves off. Cue all three leaning into each other on the end of their bed, trying to stifle their moans in each other’s skin, fully naked, as James sits, clothed and still, on a chair, watching for the slightest extreme reaction. And now they’ve gotten so used to using their zones as tricks to finish themselves off that they can’t come without them and just sit there moaning on the edge, unable to go over.

 


	28. T-rated Youtuber au

Danny posts the most random anything. They're not quite vlogs, not quite video essays, just kind of him talking and occasionally throwing up visual aids and playing music.

Q would be like a one-man Hak5.

James does martial arts tutorials and demos, plus the odd how to escape from kidnapping tricks and self-defense stuff.

Alex is strictly business. He posts informational videos, tries to promote causes he cares about. Then he got drunk one night and posted a vid of how sensitive he is about Disney movies and now he's the internet's secret darling.

James is well loved because he always makes sure to address his self-defense vids and pieces of advice to people of any gender and doesn't claim that only girls are victims of sexual assault. He's also got surprisingly good tips that don't require you to own things that no normal person would own. He's just subtly inclusive and that makes his videos easier to watch.

Danny is loved because he just lives a real fun life and he's happy most of the time. However, he does have some old sad vids which tell about his depression. He's been trying to convince himself to delete them, but something always stops him; usually it's a quote from James, reminding him to grow from his mistakes, not deny them. (mistakes being the drugs not the depression).

Whenever he would get high somehow Danny would find himself watching James' videos because the cadence of his voice made trips easier to deal with and eventually James' words about self-improvement penetrated far enough into his drugged-up mind to actually get him into rehab.

Q is loved because he is hilariously awful at explaining things in laymen's terms. Like eventually you'll get it, but he jumps around and assumes the viewer will know what some things are and ends up explaining other things and he's always got them mixed up. His info is really good he's just hilariously awful at articulating it.

Alex is the king of good communication and when he puts out a vid on solid communication strategies, fans of Q just bombard his twitter with a link to the vid. They expect him to watch it, maybe react to it, but he's a niche channel and doesn't really know how being sent someone else's YouTube video works and before they know it he has Alex on his show, begging to help him explain things.

Alex's genius is truly shown here as not only can he help Q with communications but to Q's shock and awe he actually understands every concept even explained at Q's level.

Some other martial arts youtuber calls out James one day, trying to start drama, calling him the F work (not the four letter one) and basically just jamming him with every offensive thing he can.

James does a video in response of him destroying a punching bag then walks calmly over to the camera, sits down, smiles, and comes out to the entire internet.

There's nothing the other guy can say to stop the wave of hate he receives, and the support James does.

Alex does a Q&A, and someone asks him why he was blushing so much when he was on Q's channel and Q couldn't see him looking. He stutters through an answer, clearly thrown

then he ends up drunk again, on Instagram this time, alternating between moaning into a cup about how gorgeous Q is and sobbing over his internalized homophobia inherited from his parents. Everyone is charmed beyond belief.

Q finds out, because of course he does, and he invites Alex back onto his show. Alex is nervous but shows up expecting Q to pretend it didn't happen and just do a normal show but instead Q hugs him, and sits him down, and they have a wonderfully candid conversation about LGBT issues and internalized homophobia, a topic wildly off their usual themes but something Q felt was really necessary to address (before you worry about Q forcing Alex into a corner, this was not live, they recorded it, edited it together, and then it was published with Alex's permission).

At some point in the video Q also comes out, with very little fanfare, as if it's just a fact of life like the color of his hair. It really helps a lot of viewers, some who advocate for normalizing LGBT identities and some who think it's important to stay separate from heterosexuality and to make LGBT identities stand out.

Danny has never come out officially, but everyone knows Danny's gay. Like, they _been knew._

Danny's too much of a walking, talking stereotype to be anything but gay. He doesn't feel the need to officially come out because it's already obvious.

Danny does a short segment during a more serious moment talking about your personal heroes. Maybe on veteran's day or something or it's a challenge being passed around and he mentions James and how much he means to him.

One of Danny's friends sets up a secret camera vlog called "Introducing my bff to his hero" where he tricks Danny into coming somewhere and lets him meet James in person and go for coffee with him.

Danny is thrilled and they hit it off real fast.

Slowly Q and Alex start dating, after a brief argument over age and pedestals Danny and James get together too. Q and Alex are public, Danny and James are private.

They all meet up at Vidcon and really hit it off and the event ends with an orgy in their top floor hotel rooms and they end up together after.

Their channels become huge, as does their subscriber count. They’re featured in newspapers as huge advocates for LGBT rights and for polyamory.

Bond’s YouTube channel is one where he just talks into the camera. No frills. Just James looking into the lens. honesty. authenticity. confessions. That husky voice when he's tired; he rubs his hand through his sweaty hair and fangirl ovaries explode.

James films at all hours of the night and morning because his PTSD acts up a lot and he has to do martial arts to stop thinking about it. So, he’s often posted vids while really tired, dark circles under his eyes only emphasized by the sweat dripping down his brow, the windows outside the studio are pitch black.

Once he was live streaming with a motion activated camera and just passed out from exhaustion and there was just footage of him snoring for several minutes before the camera automatically shut off. Danny spent the time memorizing his face, taking screenshots, and stroking the screen like a teenager.

Once James and Danny get together they do all these geeky funny vids:

James’ channel during their relationship:

TEACHING MY BOYFRIEND TO DEFEND HIMSELF (hint, he’s hopeless)

TECHNIQUES TO SILENTLY ESCAPE A SLEEPY CUDDLE (not clickbait)

Danny’s channel during their relationship:

My Grumpy Boyfriend Has Fun for The First Time!

How Much Concealer to Apply to Trick Your Significant Other into Thinking You Slept (gone wrong)

Q during his relationship with Alex:

I use a hairbrush for the first time ft. My boyfriend, Mr. stylish ;)

Specialty switch; engineer vs mathematician. The Final Battle!

Alex during his relationship with Q:

Laws surrounding cybercrimes and other nightmare fuel

My boyfriend hacks my computer; why I sleep with one eye open


	29. Grindr au

A discord friend's prompt:

 

Pre relationship!Danny is the kind that’d go out of his way for a Grindr hook up, knowing very well it’ll be disappointing. And still being sad that it was disappointing.

 

My runaway train following that: 

 

Danny is looking for a human connection more than anything. He just wants to laugh with someone and feel like he isn't getting used as a masturbation aid by his partner but he isn't quite self-aware enough to recognize that this is what he needs.

 

 

All he knows is that he wants something and the more hook ups he had, the less he finds it.

 

 

Then he meets Q.

 

 

They come over to Q's house to have dinner first and have a laugh about their shared appearance.

 

 

Danny fully intends to participate in yet another disappointing night, but he gets too drunk on Q's wine and actually falls asleep.

 

 

Q finds him absolutely adorable and places him on the couch.

 

 

Danny wakes up embarrassed but determined to prove himself. He comes on to Q when he sees him and they start getting heated when the doorbell rings. Q pulls back. "Shit," he breathes. Danny asks what's wrong and Q says, "my boyfriends are home early." Danny is at first horrified, assuming he's being used as a mistress. Q is quick to put hands on his shoulders and calm him down. He yells back at the door, "just a minute," and the knocking stops. Q explains in quick hushed tones that he's in an open relationship and that if Danny doesn't feel comfortable he can leave now, he can go into the bedroom and have sex with only Q, or he can meet Q's boyfriends.

 

 

Danny's attitude at this point is fully set on f--k it, so he agrees. He meets Alex and James and then comes on to all of them and they're in bed getting hot and heavy when James and Alex notice that Danny's still a little uncomfortable.

 

 

They tell him directly what they believe he's looking for and immediately begin to roleplay a fantasy where he's their boyfriend. Danny is fully consenting but reluctant to let his forbidden hopes get up but he just feels so good and happy for once and he lets all three of them pretend, just for a bit.

 

 

He has the best sexual experience of his life but is absolutely mortified afterwards. He makes awkward goodbyes and basically runs away.

 

 

Alex finds him on grindr later and begins to message him. They talk a bit and Alex isn't the best conversationalist but he does tell Danny that he's been all the three of them can talk about.

 

 

Danny's touched, and agrees to meet Alex for coffee in a couple of days. They meet and they talk and it turns into a date. When Danny gets back to his house he expects Alex to come up with him but Alex just kisses him and says he's not quite ready for that (him being Danny). Danny's a little pissed but in his heart of hearts he knows Alex is right.

 

 

He makes contact with James next, purely by accident James claims, and Danny gets a shovel talk followed by some hot threats of what delicious things James would do to him if he was one of them.

 

 

Danny's still reluctant and doesn't want to make a snap decision anymore. Most of his friends are no help because they are all like, "you got three gorgeous guys after you? What kind of gay are you, go for it!" and they miss the emotional point.

 

 

Danny stresses and stresses until he finally approaches Q about it and Q agrees to do a kind of trial period for Danny.

 

 

This turns into "sort of relationship sort of not" fun for a while until they finally all agree to have sex again and Danny asks if they're going to roleplay a real relationship again and Alex just looks up at him with big sad eyes and says, "It's not a roleplay anymore, not for me. It's real. Is it real for you Danny?"

 

 

Danny flushes all over but manages to squeak out a yes and they all have a wonderful time and a great rest of their relationship.


	30. Inexperienced!Alex and Danny au

Whenever Alex got erections in the past he would mostly just try and wait until they disappeared or take a cold shower. It’s not like he’s never touched his own dick just he hasn’t ever really gotten much pleasure from it because he has a very analytical mind and didn’t consider the implications of “the Brain is the largest sexual organ.”

 

 

For all intents and purposes he’s not really been horny or masturbated over anyone before.

 

 

But now he has three partners, who often have various parts of their bodies on his dick, he’s a bit more sensitive.

 

 

He’s thinking about some of the sex they’ve had, sitting on his bed (in my head they all live in a two story split level loft and each has their own bedroom and one large communal one. The individual beds are for if someone is sick, or has to wake up early in the morning, comes in late, or in very rare occasions, for fights.)

 

 

And Alex finds himself half-hard with no idea of what to do.

 

 

Danny happens to walk past his half open door, seeing poor Alex with his shorts on the floor, just holding his dick in his hand, staring balefully at it.

 

 

Danny wants to laugh but he sees that Alex is genuinely a bit upset.

 

 

He comes in and through sputtering gets the story from Alex.

 

 

Danny, pretty darn sexually experienced and especially experienced in self-pleasure, offers to help teach Alex.

 

 

Alex is very embarrassed that he can’t figure it out himself but Danny assures him that he wants to do this for Alex because it will make him happy to teach Alex how to make himself feel good.

 

 

He doesn’t want to masturbate Alex for him or just demonstrate, it’s too impersonal.

 

 

So he pulls a mirror over (my DannyxAlex mirror kink comes out) and sits behind Alex, his body almost completely hidden behind Alex’s.

 

 

He wraps an arm around Alex’s waist, rubbing his hip, the other settled on his shoulder. He instructs Alex from there, telling him to put his hand on himself and make moves to find out what he likes. Eventually he begins to take it to the next level and instructs Alex to close his eyes. This distressed Alex who has been relying on his glimpses of Danny to stay turned on.

 

 

But Danny just chuckles and increases the pressure of his hands. When Alex has his eyes closed Danny asks him to gently tip his head back onto Danny’s shoulder and Danny begins to lick Alex’s ear and whisper what he could be imagining into his ear.

 

 

Stuff like “you can’t see me but you can feel me, you can feel how hard I am. Picture my cock in your mind. See my face, red and flushed, rubbing helplessly against your back as the sight of you turns me on.”

 

 

Then moving on to “think back to the best orgasm you’ve ever had, do you remember what we were doing then? I want you to replay it. You know what’s best about this?” “What?” Alex breathes. “You’re in charge. We’re all yours. If you want Q on the bed on all fours, moaning, all you got to do picture him there. If you want James behind him, eating him out and stroking himself, you can make that happen. Keep stroking yourself. Keep the image steady in your head. Start opening your senses. Can you hear Q panting? The slurp of James’ tongue? Can you smell their sweat? Feel my hands on you and the warmth of my body. Taste the spit pooling in your dry mouth.”

 

 

Needless to say, Alex goes over pretty fast. Danny gives Alex, to his mortification, a schedule the next day, instructing him when to pleasure himself and how.

 

 

Meanwhile Danny shares the experience with James and Q who find it amazingly hot.

 

 

Eventually they work it to all of them in one room, Alex the only one naked, all the others fully clothed, not touching him, just listening as he stutters out what he’s picturing behind his closed eyes in response to Danny’s prompting questions.

 

 


	31. Series of Prompts Brainstormed for 007 fest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers ahead beware

Everyone is a member of MI6 au

Rival spies au

 

Rival hackers au

 

Q and Danny are brothers au

 

Sherlock crossover au

 

Alex/James Fakeout-makeout trope

 

Undercover trope

 

Spy school au

 

Danny/Q rival spies with the same face au 

 

Alex/Q Danny dies in London Spy rather than Alex and he has an angsty rebound with Q because he reminds him of Danny

 

Turing meets Pam for the first time

 

Name Q's cats au

 

James meets Q's cats

 

James/Q celebration of a successful mission

 

Alex/Q rival hackers au

 

James/Danny seducing a mark for a mission

 

Alex/Danny/Q birthday surprise

 

James/Danny/Q two quartermasters au

 

Alex/Danny/Q/James baby can't tell the difference between two parents with identical faces

 

Danny/Q parent trap au 

 

Danny/Q/James switching places to confuse 007 and see how long until he figures it out

 

Danny/James breaking into MI6

  

Danny/Alex the good happy times of their eight month relationship

 

Alex/James shadowing a work

 

Alex/James rookie and mentor

 

Danny/Q/James injured in the field/doped up on anesthetic au

 

James/Danny/Q bodyguards assigned to keep an eye on Danny's necklace

 

Alex/Danny/Q faking Alex's death

 

James/Alex seduction classes

 

Danny/Alex slow makeout

 

Q/Danny narcissism

 

Alex/Q/Danny flashback on Alex meeting Q at MI6

 

Alex/James/Q/Danny making a poly relationship work

 

Alex/James/Q/Danny switching husbands for a day

 

Alex/Danny/Q/James witness protection

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a dumping ground for the prompts I created for 007 fest.


	32. Lingerie Model Danny AU ft. Alex

Picture a long white hallway, lit up to the point the walls almost glow, a simple grey carpet stretching the length of the room. The carpet ends and the room opens up to a large atrium with a high ceiling and two staircases curving off to each side. At the beginning of the carpet are two opaque sliding doors. With an audible finger click the two doors open and a single heeled foot stretches out onto the carpet. 

It's a simple pump, a thin heel, covered in blue grey velvet with a bow over the top of the feet. Then a pair of thin legs, muscles hinted at under hairless ivory skin. One leg sports a thin frilly garter, plain white but for a cream ribbon on the top and bottom. From there modesty is preserved by a miniskirt with an asymmetrical hem. The material is snakeskin, but white as the rest of the room with a grey tint.

The slender male chest that follows is painted by a bustier, the cups perfectly fitted to the flat chest they cover rather than trying to pretend at a woman's figure. This is a man, a beautiful man, and he's aware of it, considering the confident smile curving the corners of his lips. The bustier is creamy white, clearly satin, strapless with an inch of lace decorating the bottom, not hanging free but conforming to the man's lower pectorals, directing the eye to his absolutely sinful waist. The outfit is topped off by a thin scarf, translucent white mesh, looking like a single tug could rip it. A few small pearls and rhinestones glint in the man's hair, hidden and secured to a few hanks of hair that are thicker than the rest of the artful mess.

He knows who he is, he knows what he does, he knows what he does to the people watching, the men in suits and women in dresses lining the walls, their hands unconsciously bringing their cameras up to their eyes, taking shots before lowering them again, capturing the beauty in their memory rather than their feeble pixels.

The man licks his lips, a soft pink tongue slithering across faint gloss. He's not the type to wear makeup, it washes him out. He's a pale statuesque man and he owns it. His hair will always be dark, his eyes bright and stunning, and his limbs long. His waist tiptoes around the edge of unhealthy but in reality that's genuinely what he was blessed with. He could never bring himself to hurt himself, not even for his profession. There is nothing more beautiful than when he's comfortable in his own skin. Maybe he doesn't obsess quite as much as other models, but he's still the best for a reason.

One of his hands rests on his hip, fingertips trailing absentmindedly over his hipbones, a suggestive gesture intended not only for his voyeuristic audience but especially for one man, hidden in the crowd, the only one without a camera in his hand. Why would he need it, when mere hours before this same ethereal beauty had been stretched out on his white sheets, panting and writhing, taking some very special pictures.

The man in the crowd has every picture he could need. Men would kill for what he casually leaves in his unlocked dresser drawer. His muse doesn't care. If the pictures are released it's all just another part of the game. He's selling sex, he's selling the momentary glance that brings to mind what he might look like in the throes of passion himself. They are all thinking, what would he look like under me, what would he look like on top of me, what would I press him against, would he moan, would he smile, how would it feel to have what I see now under my hand, hot, and human, and breathing?

The muse completes his circuit, a walk down the carpet, then coming down the stairs, pictures flashing all around him as he tip toes and twirls, letting the scarf be the only object to move, sliding down his back to cause a shiver, tucking against his concave stomach in a caress.

And with that he is gone, taking himself, leaving the fantasy, leaving the images and sensations that many in the crowd will be gasping to that night. The man in the crowd chuckles. His lovely muse is playful. Those are always the best days. The days the artist is confronted by the energy of his muse, sweeping it, and the man, into his arms, having to wrestle it around, mess it up, redirect it towards more productive pursuits.

The camera follows them to the bedroom, because how could it not? The model's life is being seen, being an image of a dream, a fae futilely captured time and time again in stillness that will never reach the majesty of living color.

The artist is constantly amused by his lover, the way he loves so much the exercise of sensuality, sexual or otherwise. It makes the artist's heart stop to see his muse taking his shoes off as to see him unclothed and shuddering.

The silverware lies cold in their cabinets; they feed each other by hand, stroking the fabrics that cover their skin, sucking the taste of juice off of each other's fingers, savoring the fullness of a filling morsel. The image is their life, for these rare two the fantasy is real. They fall onto clean sheets each night, stretching, sliding, touching, both each other and what is around them, so mind meltingly present they may just collapse from all this happening that goes on around them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shhhh I was in the mood to write this don't be mad I didn't update everything else sorry. Also the format is somewhat different so I hope that's ok.

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a collection of various hcs and aus I wrote for the 00qad fandom on discord.


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